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Joke of the Day

"How many Grateful Dead fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just wait for it to burn out and follow it around the country for 20 years."

"""What doesn't kill you makes you smaller."" ~Mario"

"accidentally called the guy at the oil change place ""mom"""

"Warner Brothers' 2015 film schedule."

"What did the fat simpleton say to the psychic cripple? ""Hodor."" Edit: And this is dirty how?"

"I love how people say they're ""expecting"" a baby, as though it might be something else, like a penguin."

"I got kicked out of the library for putting a ""Women's Rights"" book in the the fiction section."

"'You never get anything right' complained the teacher. 'What kind of job do you think you'll get when you leave school ?' 'Well I want to be the weather girl on TV.'"

"NSFW What word starts with a 'C' and then ends with 'U-N-T'? ""Count"" you dumb cunt."

"Why didn't the bride and groom exchange their wedding vows? TL;DR"