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Joke of the Day

"I've started calling my girlfriend names like Custard, Ice cream, Pudding, Chocolate cake, or Apple pie. I'm planning to desert her."

"Do you know what's cooler than those fake chains around your license plate? Everything. Every single thing in the world."

"hey i just met you and this is crazy but i'm your mom now you small weak baby"

"Amazon Prime is seriously way better than Netflix. I love it almost as much as my Zune."

"What is a pirate's favorite letter? C"

"You put the punch line in the title How do you ruin a good joke on Reddit?"

"Your baby's got pink eye, bronchitis AND a double ear infection? Are you even trying to keep him alive?"

"How many black people does it take to start a riot? -1"

"If I had a million dollars i'd pay to have sex with your mum and i'd probably invest the other $999,990"

"A woman walks into a bar and orders a double entendre And the bartender gives it to her."