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Joke of the Day

"What do you get when you suck all of the Botox out of Madonna? Betty White."

"Are you looking for work spreading the word of Jesus? Because I can offer you the missionary position."

"i think when there's a new viral thing and instead of checking it out you're like ""eh who cares i bet it's dumb"" that's Internet Adulthood"

"Did you hear about the race between Cambodia and Burma? It was a Thai."

"What kind of cancer always stands by the government? Pro-state cancer."

"I once lost my thesaurus... and I couldn't find the words to describe how upset I was."

"*crawls seductively across bed* *elbow gives out*"

"If you had a donkey and it bit off my rooster's legs, what do you have? Two feet of my cock in your ass."

"Did you know you can tell whether an ant is male or female easily? Just drop it into water, if it sinks it's a girl ant. But if it floats it's a buoyant!"

"A radio wave walks into a bar and asks for a pint. The barman says, ""here you go, but why the long phase?"""