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Joke of the Day

"It's a pleasure to do business with you. I look forward to screaming at your customer service representatives in six months."

Next Joke
 
"There's nothing worse than getting bullied in school... Especially if you are a fish."
"Congrats everyone! my eldest son Glandon is now 240 months old and can phsyically overpower me even when grounded"
"I don't understand people who practice polygamy. Why would anyone want more than one mother-in-law?"
"Santa: What do you want for Christmas? Me: a dragon! Santa: noo, be realistic Me: a girlfriend Santa: * cough * what color do you want your girlfriend?"
"[staff meeting] ""Ya so heads up, someone grabbed my lunch from the fridge, and there's a 420% chance you shouldn't eat the brownie inside"""
"Pimp my ride I've just ordered the personal number plate BAA BAA. Should look cool on my black jeep."
"How can you tell if your sperm count is high? Your partner has to chew before they swallow."
"Hate when I eat the last bite and didn't notice it was the last bite so I couldn't mentally prepare myself and get any closure."
"A lot of people end a question with a period. Usually that question is ""Am I pregnant?"""