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Joke of the Day

"Why is Nicolas Cage's radio so loud? He doesn't know how to turn things down"

"One sperm says to another... ""Hey, which way to the egg?"" The other sperm replies, ""I'm not sure, but we just passed the tonsils."""

"Pro tip: most pro tips are given by amateurs."

"Saw an ad for a mirror. It said ""Never used"". How, then, did they know it was a mirror?"

"Yo mama so dark she went to night school and was marked absent!"

"How can you tell if you have a high sperm count ? Your girlfriend has to chew before she can swallow,"

"I realized that my parents can be proud of my strict upbringing when I tripped and fell down the whole staircase shouting ""OUCH, OUCH! It hurts!""."

"Roasted beef is like regular beef except the cows family tells embarrassing stories about it, which are tough and tasteless."

"Sometimes I put my workout gear on and watch tv because it's the thought that counts."

"I don't like being told what to do unless I'm naked."