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Joke of the Day

"Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? All they said was ,""Bach, Bach, Bach"""

"Took my car to the mechanic because it was making a terrible noise... Turns out it was just a Pitbull song on the radio."

"No ""It's not complicated"". One of you is just a dumbass."

"Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie from drowning? He was *too far out, maaan*."

"What do you call it when alpacas with speech impediments take over Earth? The Alpacalisp."

"Have any of you heard about the magician who was driving home? He turned into a driveway."

"Anyone who says their wedding day was the best day of their life, has never had 2 candy bars fall down at once from a vending machine."

"How do you get a blonde on your roof? Tell her drinks are on the house."

"How do you know if you're making out with a french horn player? They keep trying to put their hand up your butt."

"I love animals, and I want to stop eating meat... But I just can't quit cold turkey!"