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Joke of the Day

"I bet in hell you have to sleep in a hot bedroom with a pillow that never has a cool side."

"Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar followed by Batman."

"Got my ass fucking handed to me at Candyland again today by my 3 year-old. This decade is going to SUCK."

"We were told we were gonna get 8 inches and only ended up getting 2 Sounds like every woman I've ever been with"

"Tofu is really overrated It's just a curd to me."

"Why should a man never bang his best friend? He'll probably catch fleas"

"""I don't see race."" -Russian guy in the back row of a NASCAR event"

"Had A Fight With An Erection This Morning Beat it single handedly."

"I don't discriminate among size guys. Personally my favorite is 3 inches and goes by the name visa, mc, or amex."

"Marriage teaches you a lot about yourself. For instance, I've learned that I don't need to use so many paper towels, and they're expensive."