230058
Joke of the Day
"Excuses are like assholes... Fuck 'em"
Next Joke
"So you are distantly related to the family next door are you? Yes- their dog is our dog's brother."
"So my girlfriend asked me to make love to her like in the movies.... So I pulled out and busted all over her face....apparantly we don't watch the same movies"
"Not to brag, but I've satisfied every waitress that's ever served me... With just the tip."
"New Year's Day: Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual."
"Punctuation is the difference between ""Love trumps hate""... and ""Love Trump's hate."""
"Why did God create Adam before he created Eve? So no one would tell him how to make Adam."
"I once got a d in school. It was degrading."
"What's invisible and smells like cough drops? Koala farts"
"Someone told me it was as easy as pie It never ended"