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Joke of the Day
"Excuses are like assholes... Fuck 'em"
Next Joke
"What did Shakespeare name his pet pig? Hamlet."
"Hey morons, when in doubt, just spell it ""theiyr're."""
"What noise does a nut make when it has a cold? ... CASHEWW!"
"Friend: What happened? 15yo me: *arm in a sling* Got hit by 2 buses. Friend: What happened? 37yo me: *in a full body cast* I sneezed weird."
"Whats the difference? Between a large pizza and a black father. A large pizza can feed a family of four."
"Urine is the opposite of you're out."
"1 in every 5 dolphins is a method actor."
"The Awkward Moment When Your Dog has Girlfriend and you still Single"
"Dating a single mother: It's like continuing from somebody else's saved game."