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Joke of the Day
"I want a firsthand test of the ""mo money, mo problems"" hypothesis."
Next Joke
"Making my kids homemade blueberry muffins. *opens package* *adds water*"
"Chuck Norris does not follow fashion trends, they follow him. But then he turns around and kicks their ass. Nobody follows Chuck Norris."
"I just violently threw up for 6 minutes and now my coworkers think I'm the lead singer of Creed."
"So my fiancee rolls over, wakes me up, and says, ""honey, your alarm is going off."" I say..... ""pics or didn't happen."""
"My sex life is like a Bond villain... Goldfinger"
"What do you call a Mexican at the bottom of the ocean? Pollution. What do you call every Mexican at the bottom of the ocean? Solution."
"The Chuck Norris' action figure has slept with more women than most men."
"Bartender: YOU'RE the guy that drinks from the soap dispenser in the toilets? Me: [I try to say ""NO"" but it's just lavender scented bubbles]"
"""Hey is BB hungry?"" ""No BB-8."""