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Joke of the Day

"""Hey is BB hungry?"" ""No BB-8."""

"Wanna hear a joke? ""Why did the chicken cross the road?"" ""Why?"" ""To get to the house of the ugliest human on the planet. Wanna hear another joke? Knock-knock...."" ""Who's there?"" ""Buc-buc-bucaaaaaw!"""

"Where does Stevie Wonder park his car? In blind spots."

"My Doctor says I need to start exercising religiously. So now I hit the gym on Christmas and Easter."

"I hope that guy that ""wants to be a billionaire"" makes $999,999,999.00 and then gets hit by a bus"

"[girl texting me] you left a sprite in my fridge [CUT TO] Me, crossing step one off of my ""secretly move in with her"" plan"

"*strums ukulele* This one goes out to my ex wife, Lucy. It's called ""I know how much you hate ukuleles so I wrote a 9 minute ukulele song"""

"What's a pigs favorite morning tv show ? Morning Ham"

"For sale: $300 King size mattress & box spring, 6 mo old, Never had sex on it, not even once. IDK ask her."

"I should call you Dr. Cause you just got a PhD in gettin schooled."