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Joke of the Day

"What's grey? A melted penguin!"

"[Gets Twitter error: ""Somehow, somewhere, something went wrong""] I know Twitter, I know. That's why I'm here."

"Trying to understand some people is like trying to pick up a turd by the clean end!!!"

"If I had a dollar for every gender there is... I'd have two dollars."

"I just slept with Pinnochio. No strings."

"""It's a bird!"" ""It's a plane!""... What the hell were those two so excited about?"

"How many South Americans does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 Brazilian"

"If he can't build a wall, Trump is going to dig a giant hole at the border and cover it with a welcome mat like it's a Road Runner cartoon."

"I see a border patrol car drive by... So I ask my mexican co-woker if he has his visa. He looks at me cofused for a minute then says ""no no I only have debit card"" (true story)"

"What do you call an atheist cartoon? Fedora the explorer"