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Joke of the Day

"A Levels Despite my A Level results being A B B A, it still seems no employer will Take a Chance On Me."

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"Just got my grades back for my computer science class. Apparently, I got a C++ on my final."
"What did the colon tell the large intestine after several hours' worth of diarrhoea? ""Get your shit together"""
"*Goes to the store* *Buys donughts, doughnut holes, and glue*"
"Older son just taught me something that I didn't know. Apparently, the seat behind ""shotgun"" is known as ""Kurt Cobain."""
"How many tacos does it take to change a lightbulb? why don't we have both?"
"If the hamburgler was black he'd be dead because mayor mccheese was basically rudy Giuliani"
"Coup attempt on Turkey from the rear Did Greece help?"
"ME: [whispering]""Yes, 911? Someone's breaking into my house!"" 911: Stay calm. Do you have an address? ME: ""um no. I have on pajamas"""
"When is paint free? When it's on the house."