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Joke of the Day
"If the hamburgler was black he'd be dead because mayor mccheese was basically rudy Giuliani"
Next Joke
"I'm still mad NYC banned the lead paint I used to like sucking off my tenement windowsills. #DontTreadOnMe"
"Occasionally, I like to go to Walmart, buy a jar of Vaseline, a cucumber and a Bottle of Gin and wink at the cashier"
"What is green and flies above Poland? Peter Pansky"
"Mom: Help! Is anyone here a doctor? Vet: I treat horses but maybe i can help M: My son broke his leg! V: Ok hang on. My rifle's in the truck"
"Two Wrongs Don't Make a Right... Just like two thongs don't make it tight."
"Jesus is a deadbeat dad Said he'd be coming back soon 2000 years ago and we're still waiting."
"[me as a passenger on the titanic] oh ewww are there olives in this salad? YOU be quiet lillian, i swear this trip cannot possibly get worse"
"What did the hamburger name his daughter? Patty"
"Why do women make bad engineers? Their whole lives they have been told 5 inches is 8"