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Joke of the Day
"A good date ends with dinner. An excellent date ends with breakfast."
Next Joke
"What did the lion say to the antelope? RAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
"Three old men are walking down the street... The first old man says ""Hey, it's Windy"" The second old man says ""No, Thursday"" The third one says ""I agree, lets go get a beer"""
"Some people wake up in the morning & are all like ""omg I'm the luckiest person in the world"" and I wake up all like ""oh my god"""
"My therapist says I should stop breaking into his house to tell him all my problems ... and also that he's not a therapist ."
"Calling your girlfriend by her Moms name during a fight is a great way to escalate the situation."
"I got a new clock at IED.com"
"Girls like bad boys, so why can't I get a girlfriend? I'm bad at literally everything. (If you came here expecting a joke, I'm sorry, the joke is my life)"
"I've always wondered what I'm saying when I meow back at my cats."
"How did the mathematician solve his constipation problem? He worked it out with a pencil."