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Joke of the Day

"You know your life sucks... when your job sucks, your car sucks, your house sucks, but your wife doesn't. - Sorry if it's a repost."

"Why don't you ever see elephants hiding in trees? Because they are really good at it"

"how to know if a thin girl is anorexic? she posts her nudes in bbw subreddits."

"There was time in the old west A dog with three legs walks into a saloon, he slams open the doors, looks around at the startled patrons and asks, ""Anyone seen my PAW?"""

"Looked up from a text message and thought, ""Oh shit. I'm driving."""

"Why don't owls make love in the rain? Because it's too wet to woo."

"I can see you're upset. Maybe you should post more about it on Facebook. That should eliminate any more drama."

"How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them."

"Thanks for a lovely evening, I had a great time. Sure, I'll come in for a coffee. You have a lovely apartmeMY GOD that is a lot of Swastikas"

"What do they call the Hunger Games in Japan? Battle Royale with cheese"