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Joke of the Day

"Have you ever heard a joke with no punchline?"

"Q: What's the difference between a Scotsman and a Rolling Stone? A: A Rolling Stone says ""hey you get off of my cloud!"" while a Scotsman says ""Hey McLeod get off of my ewe!"""

"What do you call a broken can-opener? A can't opener."

"What's the best part of being a man? You don't have to sleep next to a hairy asshole for the rest of your life."

"Did you know the anthem of the USA is about a Mexican immigrant? The first line is even about how he got in illegally at night: ""Jose can you see, by the dawn's early light..."""

"Dear Abby, My pastor insists that being gay is wrong, yet he ends all his letters with the words ""In Him"" Help! Perplexed in Poughkeepsie"

"I find giving things a thumbs down is a very negative response. I choose to be positive and give things the middle finger up."

"I don't care if you don't like space puns. I like space puns. Comet me bro."

"What do you call an overweight hobbit's belly? His Middle Girth"

"What does your sex life have in common with a highway bridge? If you have weight limits you aren't going to see as much traffic."