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Joke of the Day
"Confucius say... He who farts at church, sits in his own pew."
Next Joke
"Marries a mime. Lives quietly ever after."
"How do you make a Jewish philosopher have a Eureka moment? Tell him the Final Solution."
"Why don't lions eat clowns? Because they taste funny"
"Why was the farmer disappointed when he tried to marry his prized melon? Because the minister wouldn't marry the two, since a melon can't elope!"
"wife: it looks too tight me: it's fine, let's just go [ten minutes later paramedics have to cut my turtleneck off after I pass out]"
"the reason quarterbacks can throw the ball so far is because it's filled with spiders and they hate it so much"
"God and Lazarus God said to Lazarus, ""Come forth, and receive eternal life!"" However, Lazarus came fifth and received a toaster."
"Winter is great because it gets dark earlier and you can get a head start on your shady activities."
"What is Bruce Lee's favorite drink? Wataaahh"