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Joke of the Day

"I told the 8 clowns in a tiny cop car to ""clown arrest me! Take me to clown jail!"" And they did. Bail has been set at 150 banana cream pies."

"Starlord: Galaxy. Superman: Earth. Spiderman: NYC. And then there's Daredevil micromanaging the shit out of 10 blocks in midtown Manhattan."

"Einstein took naps during the day. So if you want to be smarter, my advice is to take more naps while having an IQ of 160."

"Do you ever get the feeling that you're being watched? Because if it's bothering you I'll stop."

"Guy Fieri sisters name is Girl Fieri"

"I like my women like I like my cars Fast, loud, and used. Off craigslist."

"I should rename my Reddit account to Digiorno... Because as OP I never deliver"

"Two wrongs don't make a right... but three lefts make a right. And two Wrights make a plane 6 lefts make a plane."

"I'm against the marriage of anyone whose first instinct is to film and then show the world their elaborate proposal."

"tits What does one saggy tit say to another saggy tit? ""If we keep on sagging like this, they might think we're nuts!"""