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Joke of the Day

"Great news for the Texas Rangers baseball players Now that Ron Washington is no longer the manager, they are putting coke back in the vending machines"

"No Olympian will ever be better at medaling than the gang on Scooby Doo."

"My kids are always accusing me of having a ""favorite child"" which is ridiculous because I don't really like any of them."

"A guy calls 911 and says someone dropped a box on his head Dispatcher: ""Is it empty?"" Guy: ""Yes it is"" Dispatcher: ""How about the box?"" (my dad told me this yesterday)"

"What do you call a slow transgender? Translate."

"Splinter: Leo. Mikey: I'm Michelangelo. That's Leo. Donny: I'm Donatello. That's Leo. Leo: I thought I was Raphael. - Why they wear masks"

"What shoes do roosters wear? Chickenstocks"

"What do you call a fat, Italian-American ghost? A gabaGHOUL!!"

"I'd make a joke about the Hindenberg, but... I feel like it would *crash and burn*."

"No one cared about leaving children in cars when I was young. I lived in the back of an old Buick with a pack of wild dogs until I was 9."