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Joke of the Day

"There was a competition in the park today, who could go the longest without sitting or laying down. I was outstanding."

"What's the difference between an Aussie and a Yoghurt? A Yoghurt's got culture!"

"Did you hear about the new car that instead of using gas, runs on Carbon, Oxygen, Carbon, and Potassium? It's a real guzzler."

"Wish there was a way to take all of these people commenting on the internet and make them useful."

"You know you're old when you get a ""You up?"" text.... And it's 8:25 p.m."

"You're so ugly, when you were born your mom said... ""What a treasure"" and your dad said ""Lets go bury it!"""

"I hate when people ask what I see myself doing in 5 years How would I know, I don't have 2020 vision"

"Why do scuba divers flip backwards when going into the water? Because if they flipped forwards they'd still be in the boat"

"vote up if when you switch on light in a dack room and it shines, where does the dackness go to?"

"[weather guy on TV] ""Today there will be 12 clouds. One is called Simon"""