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Joke of the Day

"Somebody cut me off on the highway today during a rainstorm, and started hydroplaning in front of me. I was cross with them at first, but then I just let it slide."

Next Joke
 
"I've just text my new girlfriend that I'm into all sorts of douchebaggery. Autocorrect clearly has a different idea on what debauchery is."
"What do you call the horse that lives next door? Your NEIGHHHbor Credit: 6y/o nephew"
"What did the recent Sunni convert says about ISIS? They really scared the Shiite outa me!"
"What idiot called it a tree trimmer instead of a branch manager?"
"My favorite exercise is a mix between a lunge and a crunch. I call it Lunch"
"My Garden Statue Called In Sick Today He has Gnome-onia."
"If you ever see a movie where a woman is depressed and she has shaved legs that movie is bullshit."
"Why do black people have white hands? Because everyone has a little good in them"
"There's a silver lining for survivors of the Nepal earthquake... They felt the city breaking, And everybody was shaking, But they were stayin' alive. Stayin' alive."