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Joke of the Day
"What do you call the top wealthiest people in Mexico? The Juan percent."
Next Joke
"I am your Doctor. Sorry to inform you that you have a brain problem. Your brain is in 2 parts... Left and right. The left part has nothing right in it, and the right has nothing left in it'"
"Today, my son, Sam, told me that he wanted to become a woman. I've always wanted a Trans Sam."
"What mouse was a Roman emperor ? Julius Cheeser !"
"Why didn't the recently single goose lose her job when she made a mistake? Because she had one heck of an ex-goose"
"It's leaked that Caitlyn Jenner is winning the ""woman of the year"" award. Oh so now they're implying that men are better at being women than women are."
"So I was talking to a feminist the other day... The trial is next week"
"K: 1s(2)2s(2)2p(6)3s(2)3p(6)4s(1) Or you can write it in noble gas notation as [Ar]4s(1) and all of those numbers argon. (OC)"
"Boss: you're late Me: traffic Carol: he was in his car taking selfies again Me: goddammit Carol, I will cut you"
"DOROTHY: What do these shoes do? GLINDA: Send you home D: Lame [tries new pair] And these? G: Wait- D: [clicks heels] [turns into hamburger]"