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Joke of the Day

"It's incredible how many movies and tv-shows use Sandstorm by Darude in their soundtracks. YouTube commenters have been surprisingly helpful sourcing this information."

"Waving my hand impatiently in front of the automatic door sensor so everyone knows I am too important to wait for electricity."

"I for one welcome our new insect overlords Resistance is futile."

"I get a lot of compliments on my stamp collection but philately will get you nowhere."

"Why are a prostitute and a teacher so similar? They both get screwed"

"[Takes dog to park] *waits for romantic comedy to begin"

"Your forehead is so big you donated it to charity for shelter!"

"Life on mars found... To be unlikely."

"My dad went to Vietnam He single-handedly shot and killed 32 north vietnamese. Next year we're going on vacation somewhere else. Edit: spelling"

"Damn it's cold out. Better wear a coat, hat, gloves & boots. Sorry legs, you're still getting pants only, thanks for doing all the work tho"