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Joke of the Day

"[at dave's who has like 9 dogs] me: ""what d'you call a fly with no wings"" dave: ""keith dont"" me: ""a WALK!"" [drowns in a tidal wave of dogs]"

"Why did the cat fall into the well? Because he couldn't see that well."

"What's the real definition of trust? Two gay cannibals giving each other a blowjob."

"How does a psychic cokehead tell the future? With a magic 8-ball"

"Go with the flow Girl: Just go with the flow. Me: The last I checked that was what one of the sperms in a premature ejaculation said."

"My Wife caught me blow drying my shaft And Asked me what was i doing. Apparently heating your dinner was not the right answer"

"Sports: So how's the shoestring game goin'? Right now, it's ***ALL TIED-UP!*** Oh my-oh-my! I couldn't find a cornylamejokes subreddit, so... ~Skip"

"My wife...it's difficult to say what she does... she sells seashells on the seashore"

"Calm down, take a deep breath and hold it for about 20 minutes."

"I love Isis She's my favourite pharaoh."