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Joke of the Day

"Sports: So how's the shoestring game goin'? Right now, it's ***ALL TIED-UP!*** Oh my-oh-my! I couldn't find a cornylamejokes subreddit, so... ~Skip"

"The so called genius at the Apple Store mentioned he has a girlfriend; thus, his geek credibility is compromised & I don't trust his advice."

"Me: you have a good head on your shoulders Neck: ok wow, i'm like right here"

"A Roman walks into a bar.... A roman walks into a bar and holds up two fingers. ""5 pints please."""

"Funny one liner if the purpose of technology is to make our lives easier, then i need a ""voice-based-auto-adjustable-underwear""."

"Driving Have you ever been driving down the road and you flick a cig out of the window, then a few minutes later you smell something and turn around to see your nan fingering herself in the back seat?"

"Ramadan Putting the slim in Muslim."

"""Damn girl are you a dam, girl? Cuz your water just broke haha"" yes we will go to the hospital in a minute honey, jesus christ im tweeting"

"People that keep their chin up probably don't find as much change as I do."

"Just replaced the cat litter with 44 packages of pop rocks... And now we wait."