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Joke of the Day

"Roses are red violets are blue... Sugar is sweet and so are you... The roses have wilted the violets are dead Sugar is lumpy and so is your head."

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"My girlfriend just texted me ""myspacebarisbrokencanyougivemeanalternative?"" Does anyone know what ""ternative"" means?"
"Doctor Doctor Have you got something for a bad headache? Of course. Just take this hammer and hit yourself in the head. Then you'll have a bad headache."
"He stole my heart, so I stole his last name. Is the slogan of a very famous body parts and new ID shop in Mexico."
"Do cannibals try to eat gymnasts... for a more balanced diet?"
"It might seem unusual to feed a horse using one's anus. Butt hay, who am I to judge?"
"A drop of roof water hit my face and I reacted like it was liquid herpes."
"LPT: Never trust anyone who says ""trust me"". Trust me on this."
"TIL: Ropes can pass through themselves Ohh wait they can knot."
"They just found a Black guy hanging from a tree with 79 stab wounds in Alabama.... The police say it's the worst case of suicide they've ever seen"