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Joke of the Day

"Jesus: one of you will betray me tonight *checks phone* Jesus: WHO IN DAD'S NAME UNFOLLOWED ME?!"" *judas slyly slips phone back in robe*"

"I wish I could literally LMAO..That sounds like a lot more fun than 90 minutes at the gym."

"Long-time lurker, first time poster and I had this really great gay joke I wanted to share with you guys Butt Fuck it."

"A priest and a rabi are walking down the street... And they see a little boy. The priest says,""Hey, we should go screw that little boy."" And the rabi says,""Oh yeah? Out of what."""

"Killing spiders is easy and fulfilling if you imagine them whispering ""You look fat in those pants""."

"Why is your mom like a 360 noscope? Cuz I wouldn't hit that."

"So a man comes into a bar... Wait, no... It was a horse. So a man comes into a horse..."

"Damn girl, are you a gibson? Cause I would only use you If I would get paid."

"Two wrongs don't make a right. Unless those wrongs are 270 degree left-hand turns."

"What do you call it... ...when you get head from a black girl and a white girl at the same time? Marblehead"