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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a homeless college student? A philosophy major"

"My girlfriend said she was finishing with me because of my obssession with flowers. I said ""Where's all this stemming from, petal?"""

"An unemployed prostitute approaches a brothel manager and asks for a job. The manager regrettably replies, ""Sorry, we have too many openings right now."""

"Wish my husband got a check from the NFL for all the refereeing he does from his recliner..."

"I asked my wife what women really want, she said attentive lovers. Or maybe she said ""a tent of lovers."" I wasn't really listening."

"What's the difference between batman and a black man? Batman can go into a store without robin."

"Batman can safe the world ,but clark kent"

"There are two secrets to success 1. Never tell anyone all of your secrets 2."

"I am not going to joke about muslims and islam because.. I don't want the last thing I am going to hear to be: ""ALLAHU AKBAR!!"" and the sound of an explosion."

"I heard paralympic basketball players are very selfish, they never pass All they do is dribble."