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Joke of the Day

"Hey guys, just to let you all know I'll be closing my Facebook account in three days... But in four days I'll be explaining why I didn't leave."

"This one's for all you self-actualized people out there. You know who you are."

"If an indoor shooting range is burning, what does one scream to inform them?"

"Did you hear that Jared Fogle got sentenced to 15 and a half years? But he was happy with it cause it was under 18."

"Spent all night being teased by Medusa. Now I'm hard as a rock."

"at the salon thinking of going darker for winter maybe i'll kill the shampoo girl"

"once there was a king He was very Poor"

"What's black, has eight legs, and makes a woman scream? Gangrape"

"The CDC has updated their rules for handling Ebola: 1) put your left leg in 2) take your left leg out 3) shake it all about"

"I ate an entire pack of rohypnol last night and it didn't even affect me... Anyway, gotta go. I need to do some last minute Christmas shopping."