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Joke of the Day

"A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game."

"I gave a paraplegic a Rubik's cube... Left him completely stumped."

"RIP boiled water You will be mist"

"Why did the vegetable thief get a lighter sentence? Because he admitted the crime was *parsley* his fault."

"Chicken pot pie. My three favourite things."

"What did the lifeguard say to the hippie? You're too far out, man."

"A bigoted lumberjack controversially said ""All trees are only fit for furniture."" He was accused of mahogany. ^^^^Never ^^^^saw ^^^^this ^^^^before, ^^^^does ^^^^it ^^^^make ^^^^it ^^^^OC"

"Ok gas pump, enough! Credit or debit? Zip code? Reward Card? Car Wash? Receipt? What octane? It takes less buttons to launch a nuke!"

"Why do social justice warriors hate math? all the inequalities"

"How to tell the difference between a Crocodile and a Alligator Well one you see in a while, and the other you see later."