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Joke of the Day

"Another Math Joke Two cats are sitting on a roof. Which one will fall off first? The one with the smaller mu."

"DISPATCH: we have a report of a robbery in progress four blocks from your current location HOT AIR BALLOON COP: I'll be there in 80 days"

"Therapist: what was it like growing up? Me: I just [reaches for tissues] kept getting taller."

"Look sad dragging a kite on the ground at the park and sometimes people will let you join their picnic."

"An Irish walks past a bar. ..."

"So how do you confuse a blonde Redditor? [Answer](http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/2pi5rn/so_how_do_you_confuse_a_blonde_redditor/)"

"What did Iron Man say when War Machine asked to come with him to the future? Rhodes? Where we're going, we don't need Rhodes."

"I shot my first turkey today! Scared the shit out of everyone in the frozen food section though."

"Me: I'll take 'Marriage' for 800 Alex Alex: Having one wife too many Me: What is bigamy Alex: Nooo. We were looking for, what is monogamy"

"I only have a beard so I can scratch it while I judge."