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Joke of the Day

"I'm a recovering alcoholic! :I'm recovering from last night!"

"Two girls and a cup walk into a bar They get shitfaced"

"Q: How do you keep a ghoul from biting his nails? A: Replace the nails with screws."

"I gave up on my growing list of optometry jokes They just kept getting cornea"

"Pizza is an emotion right?"

"Why does the law prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients? To prevent clients from being billed twice for what is essentially the same service."

"Boat Bust.Out.Another.Thousand"

"When I die, I hope it's in a women's dressing room because if I become a ghost, that would be AWESOME!"

"Did you hear about the shipment of Viagra that was stolen? Police are looking for a gang of hardened criminals."

"Calling someone average is mean but I think they are the mean"