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Joke of the Day
"Can't, busy teaching a toddler gang signs."
Next Joke
"In the new Star Wars film, Han Solo goes to Chewbacca's home planet and discovers that all the other Wookies wear pants."
"I'm in the middle of inventing emo playing cards. You have to shuffle them, but afterwards the deck cuts itself."
"Roses Are Red... Roses are red, Voilets are violet, This misconseption Makes me violent"
"I know a guy who loves mushrooms.. ...He's a real fun guy!"
"Why was the dietician kicked out of the casino? He was caught counting carbs."
"Memory is the second thing we lose as we age I forgot what the first one is"
"This election feels like Tim Burton was writing and directing it and halfway through Quentin Tarantino took over."
"10 years ago, as a joke, I told everyone I was giving up sex for Lent. Haven't gotten laid since. Well played, God."
"What's the difference between a Syrian school and a terrorist camp? I don't know, I'm just flying the drone"