187837

Joke of the Day

"I'm in the middle of inventing emo playing cards. You have to shuffle them, but afterwards the deck cuts itself."

"The school year is like a burrito... After 3 quarters you're full but you have to keep going even though it's all falling apart."

"Lets all agree, having your cake and eating it too, is the same damn thing."

"Why are Muslims so violent? Because I slam."

"What do you call an aligator that likes to wear vests when no one else is around? A private investigator."

"If I don't mention you, then the tweet/status wasn't about you. But if the shoe fits, then lace that bitch up and wear it."

"How do you tell if your girlfriend's ticklish? You give her a test tickle."

"What is the definition of safe sex for rednecks... Making sure you brand all the sheep that kick"

"I've had good' tattooed down my cock. I like to see a bit of good in everyone."

"Today I learned... That I'm on the wrong subreddit."