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Joke of the Day

"ASKHOLE: A person who constantly ask for your advice, yet always does the opposite of what you told them"

"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend. Perfectly regulated office temperatures are a girl's best friend."

"I'm in a band called Duvet. We're a cover band."

"Why couldn't the NSA whistleblower leave Moscow? He got snowed in."

"I was really disappointed when I watched the films Shaft, XXX, X-Men, In To Deep, Snatch, The Box, Free Willy. None of them were what I expected..."

"I was going to tell a dick joke... But now I can't seem to 'member it."

"I tried to explain what integers are It was pointless"

"FOUR stages of girl & boy relation! 1. hand in hand. 2. that in hand. 3. hand in that. 4. that in that."

"Donald ""Pharmabro"" Trump: He wwebsite as on the internet!"

"Bartender: A shot of whiskey can cleanse the soul Me: *thinks back to the time I ""experimented"" in college* I'll take 27 bottles please"