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Joke of the Day

"Why did the chicken cross the basketball court? Because he heard the Ref was blowing fowls!"

"""Flight 1234 for noise abatement turn right 45 degrees.."" ""But Center we are at 35000 feet how much noise can we make up here?"" ""Sir have you ever heard the noise a 707 makes when it hits a 727?"""

"Missed Connection: You were attractive. I awkwardly overreacted to your presence."

"Is it possible to wanted the same thing and still break up.. Yeah, If you both only want to have sex with girls."

"I'd make a political joke but it would just end up being elected."

"Why do neurologists think they're God? Because they can turn any animal into a vegetable!"

"Secret to success is to know who to blame for your failures."

"What is the official bird of love? The Swallow."

"Judge: ""Is it true that you owe your neighbor a thousand dollars?"" Defendant: ""Yes it's true."" Judge: ""Then why don't you just pay him back?"" Defendant: ""Because it wouldn't be true anymore."""

"What does a church shooting sound like? Pew! Pew!"