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Joke of the Day
"Girls are like blackjack... I'm trying to go for 21 but I always hit on 14."
Next Joke
"What is the difference between Chelsea and Leo di caprio? Chelsea got Oscar. huehuehuehue."
"Going out in my hometown tonight. Hope my old bullies are really impressed by my parody twitter accounts."
"Dear lady arguing w/ the clerk over whether or not it is ""good"" champagne: YOU ARE IN A GAS STATION!"
"INTERVIEWER: do u have any weaknesses VIDEO GAME BOSS: [strugling to cover glowing weak spots all over body] UM"
"Nurse: ""It says here you're lacoste intolerant? Is that a typo?"" Me: ""No. I just really, really can't stand polos with crocodiles on them."""
"A man is complaining about his girlfriend in the late 17th century... Man: ""She's just a complete witch."" Not sure if it's an old joke, but I came up with this one at the bathroom."
"Cane sugar is the best! It just can't be beet!"
"Held A door open for an Asian man today he said ""sank you""... He better not be referring to pearl harbor.."
"What does a gay horse eat? Haaaaay."