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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between America and a yogurt? If you leave a yogurt alone for 200 years, it WILL develop a culture ;-)"

"If you really want to fuck a vampire.. then i'd say you're down for the count"

"Ok how about a nail polish line for office ladies with colors like Legal pad, Non-dairy creamer, Mug stain, Excel, Boss neck..."

"Innocent little girl !! ""Would you make a frog noise for me?"" The grandad, confused asks, ""why?"" The little girl replies, ""dad says when you croak we are all going to disneyland""."

"The same woman who said ""I'm your mom not your friend"" has sent me 17 Facebook friend requests."

"The jerk store called. Instead of texting. Typical"

"the worst part about being vegan is having to get up early to milk the almonds"

"What do fish smoke? Seewead"

"I dated a girl with a lazy eye once. Turns out she was seeing someone else the whole time."

"Moths must love dying because they get to go towards the light. Ughh I just anthropomorphised moths with unverified human ideas about death."