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Joke of the Day

"Husband's note on refrigerator for wife: Someone from the Gyna Colleges called. They said the Pabst beer is normal. I didn't know you liked beer."

"How did the psychiatrist break his leg? He had a Freudian slip."

"When I said that I wanted to be a comedian, everyone laughed Well, now I'm here, and no one is laughing."

"I was going to have a life but then twitter happened."

"What is black and white and red and brown and silver and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a harpoon through her head."

"Why did the blonde stare at the Ford? It said Focus."

"A man walks in his bedroom with a pig... under his arm. He says: ""I fucked this she-swine for 10 years"" His wife, shocked, yells: ""What?"" The man replies: ""Shut up, I was talking to the pig."""

"Did I tell you the joke about my penis? Oh never mind it's too long."

"I just met someone who was a steam-roller operator. He was such a flatterer."

"What do you call it when God masturbates? Jesus fucking Christ"