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Joke of the Day

"Sanders is blaming Trump for violence at his rally... because you can't truly be a National Socialist until you can excuse your brownshirts violence."

"The Flash is lucky because he can run real fast but also because he lives in a world where every problem can be solved by running real fast."

"How many drugs did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill two and a half men."

"I just walked by an old man who kept saying, ""One, three, five, seven, nine... one, three, five, seven, nine..."" I thought, ""How odd."""

"Did you guys hear about the new exorcist movie? where the woman hires the devil to pull the priest out of her son."

"What is a cat's favorite tropical destination? Meowi"

"Being a mom means saying things that shouldn't be threatening in a very threatening manner. Like, ""EAT YOUR CEREAL!"" for example."

"What do you call a Black man that walks by a Cop? A Pencil cause he's full of lead!"

"What's long and hard and has cum in it? Cumulative exams."

"What is the deal with airplane food? Seriously, I'm trying to feed this thing and I don't know what airplanes eat."