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Joke of the Day

"I think of immigration like I think of sex. It is more fun if everyone comes."

"How many vegans does it take to... None. Nobody needs fucking vegans for anything."

"Why did the chemist join the Pentecostal church? He wanted to speak in tungsten."

"Don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining. I mean, c'mon. Let's spice it up a little. Aim for my chest and call me your ""naughty potty""."

"If it weren't for snow blowers... The UPS man wouldn't come."

"Two deer walk out of a gay bar. One turns to the other and says ""Man, I blew like 50 bucks in there!"""

"(NSFW) What's the difference between driving in the fog and eating pussy? When you're eating pussy you can see the asshole in front of you."

"Why was six scared of seven? Because seven ""ate"" nine."

"Has anyone heard of the new band called 512MB? They haven't any gigs yet!"

"But seriously- how do Superheroes even go to the bathroom? I mean, look at their costumes."