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Joke of the Day

"What if there was a Christian version of ISIS called CHRISIS?!"

"Saw some kids building sandcastles on the beach so I ran and jumped on one of them. Then I wrecked his sandcastle."

"""You're either going to love me or hate me."" - someone you will definitely hate"

"What's the difference between a tire and 365 condoms? One's a Goodyear, and the other's a great year. x/post from r/funny"

"I got lost in a closet as a child... When I came out, my parents, although supportive, really weren't that happy."

"[catches spider in a glass] spider: omg are you going to drink me? me: oh no this is just to take you outside spider: me: spider: drink me"

"Studies show that on average 2 students in every fourth grade class can't count properly. It's usually one to three."

"""And that's the last time I ever pet a lion"", said Tom, offhandedly."

"If you're sad about being alone on Valentine's Day, just remember.. Nobody loves you on the other days of the year either."

"Why are spiders good swimmers ? They have webbed feet !"