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Joke of the Day

"Do you know how a frog listens to music? It uses the iPond..."

"Ask Me If I'm A Tomato"

"My Girlfriend told me to give her 10 inches and make it hurt... So I fucked her twice and punched her in the mouth!"

"What do French athletes wear? Jaques straps"

"Don't get why guys complain about ""sleeping on the couch"" I pay good money to sleep on the couch, but I wish the shrink would shut up."

"Instead of yelling, I just say ""Caps Lock"" and then speak at a normal volume."

"What would you call Scott Adsit if he was a skirt? Scott Ad**skirt**"

"What do Tits & Model Trains have in common? Tits & Model Trains were both intended for children, but are played with by grown men."

"Before I buy a leaf blower I want to make sure I understand the rules. We just blow the leaves at each other's houses, right?"

"What do you call someone who is iffy about cleaning lawn games? A wishy-washy Washer washer."