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Joke of the Day

"What do Tits & Model Trains have in common? Tits & Model Trains were both intended for children, but are played with by grown men."

"Can you taste the difference betwen creme brulee and a yeast infection? If you can't, then never piss off the hostess in your favorite French restaurant ..."

"Is fapping while high hijacking? Or is it weed whacking?"

"What's the best part of being an abortion doctor? The free lunch."

"I'm optimistic that within my lifetime it will become acceptable to wear your underwear to the supermarket."

"What's a zombie's morning routine? Shit, shower, grave."

"TIL that in 1940 a German U-Boat captain found himself aboard a British vessel. Whoops, wrong sub."

"What did the french butter say when it got stocked in the cooler? Beurre... I came up with this today while grocery shopping. I'm ridiculously pleased with myself."

"There was an unbelievably close finish in this years ""Shemale of the year"" contest. It was a Thai."

"Just built a kite that'll hold my cat. Figured if a mouse helped discover electricity then my cat & I should be able to unlock time travel."