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Joke of the Day

"There are 10 types of people in this world: Those who can count in binary, those who can't and those who weren't expecting this joke to be in base three."

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"What do you call a Mexican child molester? A Pedrophile"
"What do you call a group of lesbians from Pittsburgh? Lesbiyinz."
"Final words to David before surgery: ""If I don't make it? Swear you'll have me cremated & snort my ashes off a hooker's ass."" He promised."
"TIFU by picking up a dead bee. It wasn't. Now my thumb hurts."
"Sorry I replied ""yikes"" to your selfie."
"What's it called when Batman ditches church? Christian bail."
"I'm glad chocolate bars come with resealable packages, so I can eat half now, and the other half 1 minute from now."
"Why couldn't Snape be a Herbology teacher? Because he wasn't able to keep the Lilies alive."
"[under heavy sniper fire] Platoon leader: where's that sniper fire coming from? Me [crying a fair bit]: a big gun with a telescope on it"