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Joke of the Day

"I can undo a bra with two fingers and no eyes but can't tie a tie with both hands and a 6 minute video tutorial."

Next Joke
 
"Three tampons are walking down the street... which one says ""hi"" to you? None of them, they're all stuck up cunts"
"I went for a run. I was out 2 minutes before I had to return because I forgot something... ...I forgot that I'm fat and can't run for more than 2 minutes"
"What is the difference between complete and finished? If you find the right woman, you're complete."
"If I were a mob boss, I'd ask my henchmen to meet me down by the docks, then surprise them with a day of water skiing"
"I am black and my son stole my wallet. I don't know If I'm proud or mad."
"Whenever I see a new couple on a date I walk up to their table, hold up my phone and tell the guy ""You're Wife Sarah says hello""."
"Who do ghosts worship? Boo, DUH!!!"
"Needed directions in Hollywood last weekend So last weekend in Hollywood i managed to get lost so i approached a fancy looking black couple and asked for directions . . . They gave me their baby."
"I always cry after sex. God, I fcuking hate prison!!!!!!!"