132653
Joke of the Day
"My girlfriend asked me: ""Reddit or me?"" Sometimes I miss her."
Next Joke
"How do you congratulate the guy who won the best tie contest? You tell him... ""that's definitely a win sir"". Or if he did ok you can say you half win sir i suppose. :/"
"Encyclopedias are just ghetto Google."
"Apparently Donald Trump's favourite film is E.T... Because it's about an illegal alien that goes home."
"What do a redneck divorce and a burning meth lab have in common? Someone's losing a trailer."
"Me: What are your plans for tonight? 13: Think I'll hang out with you and mom. Me: Goddammit...uh I mean that's great."
"How can you tell if your house was built by lesbian carpenters? All tongue-in-groove, with no studs."
"I wonder how long it will be before ""You look like a million bucks"" is an insult. #inflation"
"What did the penis say to the asshole in the morning? This bowl ain't big enough for the both of us."
"What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? ""Where is my tractor?"""