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Joke of the Day
"Lif... ...is too short."
Next Joke
"Why should you never invite a boxer to a party? He always throws the punch."
"Why can't you tell Walter White a knock knock joke? Because HE is the one who knocks."
"Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar and doesn't."
"My girl told me she's depressed. Because of her weight, she suffers discrimination. I told her ""Just ignore them. You're bigger than that."""
"Whoever said that all press is good press... clearly hasn't heard of Lostprophets."
"I'm pretty sure that spiders have figured out that I'm terrified of them, and have created a game to see who can make me flip out the most."
"I'll always remember the wise advice the bishop gave me You can take the boy out of church, But you can't take the priest out of the boy."
"[office] Me: Happy Black Friday! Latisha: ... Me: I made a cake! Latisha: ... Me: ... Latisha: ... Me: ... Latisha: ... Me: It's chocolate."
"My thoughts are as pure as snow... after the trucks have driven hard and plowed through it."