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Joke of the Day
"My thoughts are as pure as snow... after the trucks have driven hard and plowed through it."
Next Joke
"What's brown and sticky? Seriously. Guess."
"Avoid confrontations in the work place by slashing your coworker's tires while they sleep."
"You ever heard the joke about the sandwich?.... ...I heard it was full of bologna"
"What do women and pennies have in common? They ain't worth shit"
"What did the frog's girlfriend need when she was on her period? A lily pad."
"Why did the blonde climb the chain-link fence? To see what was on the other side."
"How's my life? Let's just say I'm starting a lot of sentences with ""let's just say""."
"Disney couldn't handle my awesome script. Kylo Ren was Rey's father. Finn was her brother. Chewbacca was her cousin twice removed."
"[Starbucks] ME: [bursts in] THERE'S A GUNMAN AT LARGE BARISTA: [shrugs] ME: [sigh] THERE'S A GUNMAN AT VENTI B: *grande screaming noises*"