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Joke of the Day

"Ummm yeah I want one of those phone case's where I can put my credit cards in with my phone so when I lose my phone I'm also broke. Genius!"

"Sometimes, my secretary reminds me of my wife. I was unbuttoning her shirt the other day during our lunch break when she said, ""Remember, you have a wife."""

"Did you hear the one about the guy who had to go to the ER with six toy horses in his anus? They listed his condition as stable."

"How was copper wire invented? Two Jews found the same penny!"

"I wonder what my parents did to fight boredom before the internet I asked my 17 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either."

"What's a pirate's least favorite letter? The one he gets from his internet provider for copyright infringement."

"""You wouldn't like me when I'm angry... Because I always back up my rage with facts and well documented sources"" -The Credible Hulk"

"What do we want? Race-car noises! When do we want them? Neeeeeeoooooowwwwwwwwwwwwww!"

"Why can't melons have shotgun weddings? They cantaloupe"

"Why did the wine critic get kicked off the nudist beach? Because he was walking around with a semillon (semi-on)"